If you haven’t seen the Ask a Ninja video podcast before, you should definitely check it out. The Ninja answers questions every week in true ninja fashion. He just reviewed Pirates of the Caribbean 3 and you can see the review here. It doesn’t put to rest the eternal question (Ninjas, duh) but the review is hilarious and definitely accurate. Some choice quotes:
Just take the general confusion of Pirates 2 and multiply that by a bucket of chicken…That doesn’t make any sense…Neither does this movie…
Everybody was a pirate. If you were in the first movie and you weren’t a pirate…you’re now a pirate in this movie…Fish pirates…Had always been pirates…Half Dead…Full Dead…Just pretending to be Pirates…
Ninjas of the Caribbean would be a GREAT movie.
Too funny. Go watch the rest. My opinion of Pirates 3 about the same but I enjoyed it a bit more. I didn’t enjoy Pirates 2 much at all and I didn’t go in expecting Spartacus. The movie started off really slow, built up something like fourteen plot lines and was really kind of confusing for the first hour or so. After that, all manner of crazy broke loose and the rest of the movie was very unconfusing and pretty much involved all manner of pirates fighting amongst themselves.
Characters. Jack Sparrow was a let-down in this one. Geoffrey Rush got all of the cool pirate lines instead. Chow Yun Fat was cool as the Pirate Lord of Singapore (which incidentally would make a great name for a band). Who doesn’t love the monkey and the pirate with the fake eye? Again, Geoffrey Rush is where it’s at. Captain Barbossa OWNS the good parts of Pirates 3.
So anyway, My crappy movie meter was going off watching the movie but I didn’t care because there was so much going on that I was still entertained. If I want substance, I’ll rent Braveheart. Pirates 3 isn’t going to win ANY awards (not even the critically acclaimed and largely un-patented Brian and Lee’s “I’d Watch It Again at the Dollar Theatre Award”) but it wasn’t bad for a one-time Sunday matinee.
P.S. Oh yeah, and the ending isn’t great…in fact, it’s kind of terrible…and by “kind of”…I mean “really”. Ouch.
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